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I think it’s because the town we grew up in was “jappy,” and the girls in his grade were particularly horrible. And that’s something I’m actually super sensitive about in a way.Molly: Yeah, I feel the guys I grew up with are whatever the male version of a JAP is, so I have a… I guess a male JAP is a JAP (Jewish American Prince). So many of my friends are told they don’t look like Jews because they’re Mizrahi or Po C or whatever, or even just like Scandinavian-looking Jews like me.Molly: I’ve never felt any explicit pressure from my family.They’ve always been very vocal about wanting me to be happy and whoever winds up making me happy is okay with them. Though when I recently mentioned to my mom that I wanted to try to date somebody Jewish, she literally squealed, so…In my past relationships, I was younger and wasn’t really thinking so far ahead, so none of that future stuff really mattered.Now that I’m more explicitly looking for the person to spend my life with and have children with, it feels more important to at least try to find a Jewish partner.I don’t at all feel pressure to date a Jewish person and never have.
He loves to learn about Jewish culture, which I really appreciate, and almost didn’t realize I’d appreciate so much until I had sure, it’s starting to feel more important now that I am An Old and looking for a Husband.
But now we’re turning more generally to the thorny issues related to dating Jewish (or not).
To chat about everything Jewish dating, we gathered some Alma writers for the first Alma Roundtable.
Emily: I too feel like I’m becoming my Jewish grandma except I cannot cook. Hannah: My aunt married an Irish Catholic and he knows all the blessings, comes to temple, and all that stuff. It is just nice to not have the learning curve, or to have Judaism be one of the many things you do share with your partner.
There are always going to be things you have in common and things you don’t — and I think if you had to choose one thing to have in common, Jewishness is a worthwhile/valuable one.